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It has been a week and four days since my mom passed to the other side.

I went to a sweat lodge the following day. It was perfect. Powerful. Healing. Clarifying. There were others there to say good bye to theirs who had also left that week. One man lost his 30 hour old child and days later his mother. The sweat leader said what we needed to say better than we could. We got to say our words too, but somehow we knew more was at work in there. Best of all I really felt my mother showed up, saw us, thanked us, heard me thank her, was met by our ancestors and they took her to the new lands. She left in good hands with good guides. Her perfume came into the lodge at one point. I will never forget that moment.

I have seen and felt how blessed I am to have the people I have in my life. Good people just showed up at my door, some waited for me to come home just to see how I was doing, share a drink, toast to all our dead and offer gifts. Other good people called and I heard in their voices true concern and corazon. They will forever be in my heart.

I must admit I never knew how to deal with the death of my friend's loved ones. I had never lost anyone in my family that was very close. I didn't know what to say, how they felt, or what to do. I'm sorry today for not knowing and not being able to reach out to some of my friends who lost someone. I didn't know what to do or say to them. Now I know, I think. I just hope I can be as good a friend as I have seen some of mine be to me.

I had to take some days off from work. Still haven't caught up in grading. Some of my students shared their experiences with loss and it really helped a lot. This group is very special.

Never do business with Groman Funeral home on Washington Blvd. on the corner of Norwood in Downtown LA. They suck. Long messy story. We just got my mother's ashes yesterday. A week and three days after they took her body.

Today we are going up to where my mom grew up to spread her ashes. It's a small hike into shrubs and bushes. If you are reading this burn some sage or copal for us. I don't want to take any fire up there, too dangerous.