Gary Numan was the soundtrack to my teen angst. Along with Ultravox, Adam and the Ants, The Police and various punk rock bands I drummed along or laid underneath furniture with headphones on, eyes closed, escaping.
Today, when things, or friends break down I wish it was as easy to escape as it used to be.
Today's escapes are self exile, and I'm the broken friend.
Or am I going through another form of puberty?
I told my students today, in order to grow sometimes you need to go through some fertilizer, just like the grass. Shit makes you grow.
9/20/10
8/31/10
Unconditional
Most of us know the unconditional love between a parent and child.
Most of us strive for unconditional love in our other relationships.
It looks and acts unselfish and self sacrificing.
It is also soul enriching.
The highs and lows of this love are the most profound.
You look forward to every day because every day makes you closer.
Each day, each one gains some for their Self.
Each day, each one loses some of their self.
It is the love that consumes.
Most of us strive for unconditional love in our other relationships.
It looks and acts unselfish and self sacrificing.
It is also soul enriching.
The highs and lows of this love are the most profound.
You look forward to every day because every day makes you closer.
Each day, each one gains some for their Self.
Each day, each one loses some of their self.
It is the love that consumes.
8/9/10
Friday rides
Riding my bike with a group of people I do not know adds to my practice of animosity.
In South Central we ride pass a large parking lot filled with cars despite none of the stores being open.
Next to the cars were groups of people hanging out, listening to their car radios, talking, and checking each other out.
One of the riders hears me yelling at the people near their cars "Come on grab your bike!"
He then says to me, or to anyone within earshot, "How sad is that? Just standing around their cars in a parking lot."
I reply, "They are just like us, a bunch of people riding to nowhere."
7/16/10
weeks...
in a week my daughter will be 14
in weeks it will be a year since my mom passed
in weeks you can go from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows
in weeks my father will find out if it is cancer again
in weeks my students will be full university students
in weeks life changes
in weeks it will be a year since my mom passed
in weeks you can go from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows
in weeks my father will find out if it is cancer again
in weeks my students will be full university students
in weeks life changes
5/27/10
Staycation
End of the semester head spins fall into headstands at 24 hr fitness where Rudy, Kozmica y Ruben also stretch, run, sweat.
End of semester softball vs students, faculty wins, again.
End of semester F's, A's and "I was in your class but I hardly ever came, can I get a C?"
End of sanity in Arizona, apartheid returns to Amerikkka.
End of reacting to insanity masked in big lies, media repetition and myth makers/followers.
I got my own myths to tell, repeat and twist over and over again.
Looking at ideas/words like: immigrant, economic refugee, illegal, conspiracy, repetition, erasure, censor, myth maker, idea editor, dignity, racism, patience, fertility, desert, death, next gen, mex gen, bilingual, single, education, stolen, borrowed, renting, fading, reclaiming, can't deport us all (or kill), we didn't cross the borders, the borders crossed us, Machete, Shakira, stepping up, hiding out like Olmos et al. nada on Az., kissing up to whitey, eugenics, biological determinism, ghosts of lies and truths, hyperbole, honesty, honor, history, Rudy Acu~a, Nazis burn books, literacy rates in Amerikkka, die with dignity, or screaming about being under attack by the most powerless?, culture evolves, that means large parts of it die, deal with it.
End of semester softball vs students, faculty wins, again.
End of semester F's, A's and "I was in your class but I hardly ever came, can I get a C?"
End of sanity in Arizona, apartheid returns to Amerikkka.
End of reacting to insanity masked in big lies, media repetition and myth makers/followers.
I got my own myths to tell, repeat and twist over and over again.
Looking at ideas/words like: immigrant, economic refugee, illegal, conspiracy, repetition, erasure, censor, myth maker, idea editor, dignity, racism, patience, fertility, desert, death, next gen, mex gen, bilingual, single, education, stolen, borrowed, renting, fading, reclaiming, can't deport us all (or kill), we didn't cross the borders, the borders crossed us, Machete, Shakira, stepping up, hiding out like Olmos et al. nada on Az., kissing up to whitey, eugenics, biological determinism, ghosts of lies and truths, hyperbole, honesty, honor, history, Rudy Acu~a, Nazis burn books, literacy rates in Amerikkka, die with dignity, or screaming about being under attack by the most powerless?, culture evolves, that means large parts of it die, deal with it.
4/27/10
one cup
just a cup of ashes
just a cup of time
just a cup of memories
just a cup of mind
8 months seems so long ago
water washed hills
sun = green fields
soil wet from tears
just one cup of coffee
just one cup of lies
just one cup of forgiveness/unforgiveness
just one cup not mine
pray each day
me, mine, them, n those
healing quick
there are still mental blows
just a cup of time
just a cup of memories
just a cup of mind
8 months seems so long ago
water washed hills
sun = green fields
soil wet from tears
just one cup of coffee
just one cup of lies
just one cup of forgiveness/unforgiveness
just one cup not mine
pray each day
me, mine, them, n those
healing quick
there are still mental blows
4/26/10
How Many More Hoods Before One Murrieta?
Every time I see a trailer or ad for the retreaded Russell Crow "Robin Hood" it pisses me off!
I mean this story has been told at least 15 times!!!!! We get it.
When are we going to get the Joaquin Murrieta story?!?!?! Come on Robin Hood had to ditch arrows but Joaquin was dodging bullets and the largest man hunt of that era. This poet breaks it down pretty good. Like all good legends there are slight variations in the story that add to the myth of this man who died "because somethings are worth fighting for."
In this era of racist States, we need some Joaquin's to remind people what is worth fighting for.
I mean this story has been told at least 15 times!!!!! We get it.
When are we going to get the Joaquin Murrieta story?!?!?! Come on Robin Hood had to ditch arrows but Joaquin was dodging bullets and the largest man hunt of that era. This poet breaks it down pretty good. Like all good legends there are slight variations in the story that add to the myth of this man who died "because somethings are worth fighting for."
In this era of racist States, we need some Joaquin's to remind people what is worth fighting for.
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